Title: I wrote this
Description: W/o noticing that I was writing it.
Snowy - December 24, 2006 01:47 AM (GMT)
Left to right
Through the puddle.
March the crabs,
As they scuttle
A sudden wave came crashing,
A painful bashing
A deadly thrashing
A loud noise
It made no sound
No one was there
To hear the pound
No one to smile
And no one to frown.
The crabs don't exist
For their no longer around
Constructive criticism?
Can you visualize it?
Can you find the meaning to the poem?
dtroup - December 24, 2006 01:58 AM (GMT)
It's cute and has a good rythem!
Snowy - December 24, 2006 06:00 AM (GMT)
Lol, thanks Dot, I changed the ending as a clown throws the plot off a little.
glaive - December 24, 2006 06:46 AM (GMT)
Not bad, are you trying to keep a beat line to line? I only ask because no one person says something the same.
Snowy - December 24, 2006 06:57 AM (GMT)
well, if by, beat, you mean stanza, then. I work a little bit on it, but for the most part it comes naturally.
cich1 - December 24, 2006 07:36 AM (GMT)
i'm not much for poems, but that was pretty good dude.:tup:
FBG - December 26, 2006 01:33 AM (GMT)
yeah, that was pretty good. :goodpost: